When you’re in college, the day before Thanksgiving is when you get back from school and find your old friends and go out. Or, at least that’s what I remember, although that was 20+ years ago and my memory beyond 2+ days ago just sucks. Now, 20+ years removed from college, the day before Thanksgiving will be spent cleaning the house, prepping food, and listening to Rush or the Beastie Boys at top volume whenever The Commissioner is out of the house (ok, so some things haven’t changed in 20+ years).
To get through the day, especially for those traveling (may your journey be less arduous than Tashkent to Samarkand or at least less arduous than listening to Journey), a few deep smarts:
- Haiku-like observations and thoughtful, reality-based football analysis: “Watching Vince Wilfork dive for a ball and crash outstretched into the earth may be the closest I’ll ever come to watching a whale beach itself.”
- I really really really miss “Fire Joe Morgan.” While they had their crosshairs on inane sports analysis, the way they viciously decimated crappy writing was libertaing for anyone trapped in institutional writing hell: “That’s the scary thing. The scary thing is that this whole Internet phenomenon might be here to STAY. I never thought it would last this long. I thought it was a fad. Like Uggs, or outdoor fireplaces, or the color fuchsia.”
- If you’re crying over spoiled Twinkies, consider that maybe it wasn’t just the unions that killed Hostess (and this is a great example of seeing the fall before reaching the cliff): “Management promised to turn around the company’s fortunes through innovation and workplace efficiency. It tried a limited-edition return of original banana-cream Twinkies and published The Twinkies Cookbook, which included such half-baked epicurean delights as Twinkie Sushi and Pigs in a Twinkie. But ancient delivery trucks and plant equipment didn’t get replaced. The company’s pricing often didn’t keep pace with that of competitors.”
- and while I can’t recreate the entire email chain here, I can provide a sampling of the smartest assessment I have read all week on that other major political change this month: “The Chinese are immune to our consultations and quite aware of what they’re going through. Telling them how to reform or what they need to do is ineffective, though we do it anyway because there is a domestic audience for reports of this kind of intervention.”
One more note. I tried this week to make a reasoned case for why the Benghazi “scandal” is all tempest and no tea (although the teapot is very real). I deeply appreciate the comments here and deeply regret getting sucked into yet another endless Facebook debate on what happened and why and who was to blame. I took a vow in September 2011 to stop listening to sports radio because the complaining about the Red Sox was so intensely, willfully stupid — and I honored that vow until November 5th, when I could no longer stand listening to news on the radio. I’m taking another vow – not another word on Benghazi until Thanksgiving 2013. On the Middle East, yes. But not on Benghazi. In 12 months, if we don’t know more, if the scandal and cover-up crap has dissipated into nothingness, I’ll take a moment to reflect on being right. If I was wrong, I’ll have 12 months worth of reflection on what I got wrong and will be air it all out.
Ok, on to some solid advice:
What to drink while grilling a turkey
and if you’re in the greater Newburyport metropolitan region, go to Fowles for your beer and meat needs.
What to drink after the clean-up is all done and before the Patriots-Jets game – the Honeymooner (yes, I picked up the makings for this and will be serving it at the Allah Akbar Party next month). And what to drink at the end of the evening if you’re a Jets fan or just hate the Patriots:
Happy Thanksgiving all my East Luray Liar friends. Get stuffed on turkey and start training on Black Friday for ELLT 2013